by Joan Blumenfeld, MS, LPC

My client, Betty, could no longer bathe herself.  A mild stroke had left her unsteady on her feet and unable to use her right hand.  Betty also suffered from mild dementia which made it difficult for her to process all the steps needed to shower on her own.  For safety’s sake she had to have an aide assist her with bathing but she loathed the lack of privacy.

So Betty fussed.  She argued and yelled.  She refused to get undressed or enter the bathroom.  Although she eventually submitted to being showered — most of the time, anyway — it was an all-out war that exhausted both Betty and her caregiver.

We never knew exactly why Betty got so agitated over such a seemingly routine matter.  Perhaps it was a general sense that she was losing control over so many aspects of her life.  Perhaps it was the lack or regard for her own privacy.  Maybe she just had an irrational fear of water.