by Joan Blumenfeld, MS, LPC

My 85-year-old client, Henry, lives alone as he always has. He retired long ago from his lifetime career as a history professor. He never married, has no family presence locally and is fiercely independent.

Although his health is generally good and remarkably stable for his age, Henry shows signs of frailty. His mind is quite sharp and he is very charming, but his memory lapses are alarming. He uses a cane to help steady his walk and, although he is still driving, his vision is certainly not up to snuff. He admits to being lonely since his few friends have moved away or died.

Henry has difficulty managing money and paying bills on time. He can barely take care of his marketing, cooking, laundry and housekeeping, but sees no need for help with any of it. He often doesn’t make or keep medical appointments and frequently forgets or misplaces his medications.

Henry is the perfect candidate for assisted living!

I aroused his curiosity about such facilities by telling him stories of how well some of my other clients have fared in them. The idea of eating three well-prepared and nicely served meals a day in a hotel-like dining room was especially appealing to Henry. Having nurses on staff to respond to medical emergencies and aides to assist with personal care seemed reasonable (only if absolutely necessary, of course). And people to talk to and play bridge with actually sounded like fun.